Comments on: Song-A-Week #22: Every Time I Close My Eyes

By: Chase

Chase — Thu, 19 Jul 2007 01:38:55 +0000

Oops, I meant extra points to Katie and “Kate” not John…

By: Chase

Chase — Thu, 19 Jul 2007 01:37:52 +0000

Good points all around. 5 points to you all.
I heard some Rufus in there too. So extra points to Katie and John.
Minus two points to John because he mentioned Matt using gear he doesn’t have! FOR SHAME!
I think Kate has a few good points on the music not really going anywhere. But I, unlike Kate, thought that, because this is still a demo, that this is the rough idea of the song. I definitely needs some sha-bang, for sure, but I’m not exactly sure which direction to go. I think this song could potentially rock out, but I think something more interesting needs to happen.
My one good musical idea for this song is a response vocal line after each line of verse two. Maybe “her” voice???? Hrmmmmm, hrmmm, hrmmm. If I get to do any tracking on any of these finals (which I damn well better if you know what’s good for you) I could whip something interesting up if you don’t, just to see what you think. Like…
I never got inside your head (Blah blah blah line here)
Wasn’t room with all that indifference (more blah blah)
Etc. till the next chorus… Make sense?
Anyway, sowry I’m late. Was busy last week hanging out in the Springs (Or, erm, Falcon, CO.) with Caitlin. You know how it goes.
On to “this” weeks song now…

By: kate

kate — Sat, 14 Jul 2007 14:18:44 +0000

what’s that ticking sound? i’ve had to read Poe a lot lately and it is making me paranoid.
i wasn’t immediately grabbed by this song, even though i think the words are really great and the melody is nice. (it reminds me of rufus wainright, which means i agree with katie on the female voice. also it should build up to a huge ending.) but i finally figured out what was bothering me about it. i dont’ believe you. the words tell a story but the music doesn’t. there’s a lot of pointless hope left in this guy, a lot of back and forth and confusion in which it sounds like he is just beginning to let go of all this fantastically dramatic baggage. but then the melody just sounds kind of bored, like you gave up on this girl too long ago to care. but it’s not true! you are still engaged in an epic battle of love and hate, good and evil! anyway, you get the idea. opera-esque.
much love.
p.s. remind me to tell you about a song idea.

By: katie knows best

katie knows best — Sat, 14 Jul 2007 01:59:40 +0000

Pure…. Gold. I would also like what John is talking about.
BUT, in my mind I heard this really great cello playing a few things at the beginning and then starting it every time you sing “every time I close my eyes” (which is really just the beginning and then the end) haha. Anyway, and then instead of you singing harmony I had this great (rufus wainwright-esque) girl voice in my head (which was probably just my own voice, so USE ME on this song) and it just sounded AMAZING. But I agree with John, that perhaps you should try getting rid of the strumming guitars altogether. Just a thought. I mean, I could be proud of you either way. *smile*
Best song so far.

By: John

John — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 00:40:42 +0000

alright already…i wanted to listen to it a few times before i harshly judged you. i really like the melody on this song. however, i would do away with the strumming acoustic altogether. i would replace it with a piano arppeggiating and then allow the guitars to do some harmonizing stuff but keep it subtle (a la mono’s the flames before the cold mountain” or the beginning of explosions’ first breath after coma). the first few verses have it just be you singing but then at the end of the song have a choir of voices singing. so you get this huge buildup at the end. then after the vocal chorus stops, let the guitars meeble down as the falling action to the song and sing the line one last time or something like that. i think it would be stellar.
i’d use the sorrento for something lower on the neck and a tele or strat type (running through a good fender amp) to get the desired tone.

By: matty

matty — Thu, 12 Jul 2007 23:58:48 +0000

What’s a guy gotta do to get somebody to listen to his song, already???
Seriously, I think this might be my best so far. Listen to it.