To Whom It May Concern:
I just opened up my bag of Starburst, and to my dismay, I only found four pink ones! This was, of course, very sad, since pink ones are my favorite. There were a total of 92 starburst in the bag, making a paltry 4.3% of the bag pink! Broken down further, 14.1% were yellow, 29.3% were red, and a whopping 52.2% were orange! Sad, indeed. What could possibly account for this disproportionate bag of starburst, I wonder? Oh well, I still like the red ones. 
Still Chewing,
-Matthew Good
I’ll post their response, assuming it’s worth posting, as soon as I hear back from them.
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10 Comments
the pink are my favorite as well.
When are we going to see wedding photos? (no, I’m not going to stop asking until we do. So the sooner you show us the goods the sooner I’ll leave you alone! heh.)
I’ve heard snail mail letters like that to companies usually yield good responses. And free Starburst. A letter to Peter Pan peanut butter will, still, get you free Starburst. People like free Starburst.
Pink starburst are the best! I also love cream soda flavored dum-dums…
DAMN! I LOVE THE ORANGE ONES!
I sent a snail mail letter to my bank a few weeks ago. I hope i get free money. or starburst.
Starburst: Making pink acceptable for boys.
Way to take the matter into your own hands.
You should have demanded a refund.
Wilding
i can’t believe i have heard nothing back from them yet!
what kind of lives do these people lead that they are soooo preoccupied with emails MORE EXCITING than the one I sent them?? SERIOUSLY!
Did you know Starburst originated in the UK and were called “Opal Fruits”? I just found that out recently in a book I’m reading about punctuation that’s written by a British woman.